There’s one week in the books for the Atlantic Coast Conference. There were no losses to FBS teams (although Pitt tried, bless their hearts), but there also weren’t any wins against major conference opponents. Did we really learn that much about any of the teams in the ACC? Probably not. Is that going to keep us from making snap judgments about them? ABSOLUTELY NOT. To the rankings!
1. Clemson – The Tigers led Wofford 35-7 at halftime before taking their foot off the gas (and sealing Deshaun Watson in a three-piece suit made entirely of bubble wrap). I’d like to meet his tailor.
2. Florida State – How many casual ACC fans are going to turn on a game this year (particularly if their team is facing Florida State) and say, “Wait, Roberto Aguayo is only a junior? OH MY GOD!” before he drills another bajillion-yard field goal? Because I think it’s a high number.
3. Georgia Tech – Alcorn State lost 69-6 to the Yellow Jackets Saturday in Atlanta. Unfortunately for people of a certain persuasion such as myself, that might not even make the top-ten of “Disappointing performances by Braves in Atlanta” in 2015.
4. Virginia Tech – It’s hard to fault anything that happened to the Hokies on Monday night against the powerful Ohio State offense, especially after Michael Brewer broke his collarbone. It is unfortunate that ESPN had to air Brewer saying “It’ll take more than that to knock me out!” before he got knocked out, though.
5. Louisville – The good news from Louisville’s loss to Auburn is Lamar Jackson looked college-ready. He should only improve on his passing numbers (9-for-20, 100 yards, an interception) and he led the team in rushing (16 carries, 106 yards, a touchdown). Looks like we found this year’s surprising freshman quarterback in the conference.
6. NC State – With Shadrach Thornton suspended, Matt Dayes got a chance to shine, rushing for 126 yards in the Wolfpack’s win over Troy. These are new Dayes for the NC State backfield. I’m sorry.
7. Duke – Duke and Tulane were in a fairly close game Saturday night in New Orleans. Then you went to bed, and the Blue Devils went berserk on the Green Wave, scoring three fourth-quarter touchdowns.
8. Pittsburgh – It was a rough day for the Panthers. They nearly lost to Youngstown State, and they did lose ACC Player of the Year James Conner to an MCL injury.
9. Miami – Miami shut out Bethune-Cookman, which was nice. You know what wasn’t nice? The font on Miami’s jerseys. Seriously, why is Brad K2242 Miami’s quarterback? Why can’t he have a real name instead of an XBox Live gamertag?
10. North Carolina – Good news! North Carolina has a really awesome running back named Elijah Hood! Bad news! Elijah Hood only got 12 more carries against South Carolina than you did, dear reader!
11. Boston College – Hey, everyone! A Boston football team that isn’t cheating! Hello! Guys! Over here! Hello! Helllooooo! No? Oh, well.
12. Virginia – Why are you playing at UCLA, Virginia? Do you just want us to be sad? At least they play their home opener this week oh God it’s against Notre Dame nevermind.
13. Wake Forest – 203 yards down, 283 to go for Wake Forest in their pursuit of improving on last year’s rushing offense. The Demon Deacons had no trouble moving the ball against Elon.
14. Syracuse – Another unfortunate week one injury in the ACC: Syracuse QB Terrel Hunt injured his Achilles tendon and is done for the season, lobbying the NCAA for a sixth season of eligibility. Many were rooting for a bounce-back season for Hunt after he missed the second half of 2014 with a broken calf bone, but it was not to be.
Until next week, peace, love, and #goacc.
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